Lie down on the couch

Yossarian is explaining his dreams about fish to Major Sanderson, a psychiatrist.

…”Just why do you think,” he (Major Sanderson) resumed when he had finished, looking up, “that you made those two statements expressing contradictory emotional responses to the fish?”

“I suppose I have an ambivalent attitude toward it”

Major Sanderson sprang up with joy when he heard the words ‘ambivalent attitude.’ “You do understand!” he exclaimed, wringing his hands together ecstatically. “Oh, you can’t imagine how lonely it’s been for me, talking day after day to patients who haven’t the slightest knowledge of psychiatry, trying to cure people who have no real interest in  me or my work! It’s given me such a terrible feeling of inadequacy.” A shadow of anxiety crossed his face. “I can’t seem to shake it.”

“Really?” asked Yossarian, wondering what else to say. “Why do you blame yourself for gaps in the education of others?”

“It’s silly, I know,” Major Sanderson replied with a giddy, involuntary laugh. “But I’ve always depended very heavily on the good opinion of others. I reached puberty a bit later than all the other boys my age, you see, and it’s given me sort of – well, all sorts of problems. I just know I’m going to enjoy discussing them with you. I’m so eager to begin that I’m almost reluctant to digress now to your problem, but I’m afraid I must. Colonel Ferredge would be cross if he knew we were spending all our time on me. I’d like to show you some ink blots now to find out what certain shapes and colours remind you of.”

“You can save yourself the trouble, Doctor. Everything reminds me of sex.”

“Does it?” cried Major Sanderson with delight, as though unable to believe his ears. “Now we’re really getting somewhere! Do you ever have any good sex dreams?”…

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2 Comments

  1. I’m not sure I can tell the difference between what’s the book and what’s you Naz! Have you ever thought of writing a novel? 🙂

    Reply
  2. So you do understand! Oh, you can’t imagine how frustrating it’s been for me, reading books day after day by authors who haven’t the slightest idea how much better I could write! It gives me a terrible feeling of self-importance.

    Reply

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