Does a pet dog ever wonder why its owner is scooping up its shit as soon as it’s dropped one?
Does it feel generous on occasion and think to itself “There’s a good human, have this”
Does it think “Well, I slept through that robbery but atleast I can do something useful”
And when the owner is trying to furtively slip away because no-one is looking
Does it ever stop and point to say “Look, you missed a good bit over there”?

Yes, the long struggle to wrest art from the Elite has succeded. Poetry is no longer a past-time for the Rich, Idle Spoilt.

MegaDik has been spamming us with the most brilliant (and concise) poetry which has been circulating around the office today.

With lines like these you must be impressed…

Now that you’ve got a lass that’s hot
You wanna hump her juicy twat.
She’s full of passion, she’s so nice!
But would your penile size suffice?

Not sure she will long for more?
You need a dong she would adore!
But how to raise it long and thick?
Your only chance is MegaDik!

Turner Prize anyone??

Meanwhile I got myself some heavily discounted running/football shoes for 12 smackeroons and did 25 mins around Chorlton and back yesterday. The Purchase Process??

18:01 Arrive at Picadilly Station
18:12 Reach JJB Sports and browse
18:16 Enter Streetwise in Arndale Centre
18:17 “Do you have this in Size 10?”
18:18 “Do you take Debit Cards?”
18:19 (or possibly 18:20, I’m not 100% sure) “Cheers”

“When I saw my grandson using the Internet, it caught my attention. I said to myself ‘What’s this? You can find out about anything. I want an Internet!'”

One of the world’s oldest bloggers is Maria Amelia Lopez aged 95.

Her first blog entry was

“Today it’s my birthday and my grandson, who is very stingy, gave me a blog.”

Din din at Jill’s tonight, then maybe go out for drinkies??
Had an interesting time at work with presentations and brainstorming and stuff.

The recent two rounds of United Nations-sponsored talks between Morocco and the Frente Polisario on Western Sahara were positive but they could not be described as negotiations, given the two sides largely rejected each other’s views, Secretary-General Ban Ki-moon says in his latest report on the issue.

ref: http://allafrica.com/morocco/

Research overwhelmingly suggests that using a phrase such as “research overwhelmingly suggests” can increase the odds of being taken seriously.

Going to Leeds to celebrate Tinks’ birthy-day. We shall be showing those people how to partaay!

4-2 United v Dinamo Kiev, great job.
7-0 Arsenal v Slavia Prague, brilliant play!
But 0-0 Rangers v Barcelona? Amazing result.

First of all, thank you LoveFilm.com It’s a really great service and I’m really enjoying the choice during my 30-day trial. Sign up and get a free trial like I did; it’ll change your life. I love going home and finding a great movie on the floor. And it’s damn easy to use as well. So go ahead and do yourself a favour.

Maria is a 17 year old Columbian girl who worked as a flower packer in her small home town untill she got tired of being treated like a sub-human. She sets off to Bogota to find work, and an acquaintance introduces her to Felipe who interviews her for a job by asking about her digestive system.

Yes, Maria Alvarez is to be paid to swallow pellets of cocaine and fly to New Jersey.

One of the other drug carriers or mules she befriends is on the same flight, and so is her friend from the flower factory who also wants to make a quick buck. It is a common tactic to send mules together so that if one does get caught by customs officials, the risk of the others getting stuck is minimised.

A mishap occurs which strands these village girls in America.

This is a most poignant film and I was deeply moved by it.

The next one will be a Chinese movie called “Happy Times Hotel”

I heard a brilliant ad on Classic FM radio this morning on the way in to work.

Anne Bancroft: Please wait till my husband gets home.

Dustin Hoffman: When is he coming back?

Anne Bancroft: My husband will be back quite late. He should be gone for several hours.

Dustin Hoffman: Oh my god.

Anne Bancroft: Pardon?

Dustin Hoffman: Oh no, Mrs. Robinson, oh no.

Anne Bancroft: What’s wrong?

Dustin Hoffman: Mrs. Robinson, you didn’t – I mean, you didn’t expect –

Anne Bancroft: What?

Dustin Hoffman: I mean, you didn’t really think that I would do something like that.

Anne Bancroft: Like what?

Dustin Hoffman: What do you think?

Anne Bancroft: Well, I don’t know.

Dustin Hoffman: For God’s sake, Mrs. Robinson, here we are, you’ve got me into your house. You give me a drink. You put on Classic FM.

Anne Bancroft: So?

Dustin Hoffman: Mrs. Robinson – you are trying to relax me …. Aren’t you?

Ha ha!

(Disclaimer: I obviously didn’t remember the radio ad verbatim so I nicked the original film dialogue from Wikiquotes. Equally obviously it wasn’t Anne Bancroft and Dustin Hoffman doing the ad but voice-actors.)